Thursday, April 29, 2010
My Truth Doesn't Matter
One more issue. I've spent my lifetime trying to please other people, at the expense of my own happiness. Most of the time I didn't even know I was betraying myself - it just felt good to get my jollies this way - depending on the good graces from others - needy for their positive feedback - unsure of my own instincts.
But we do these things to elicit love from others. And most of us learned this behavior way back in our childhoods.
So if you can learn it - you can UNlearn it. Easier said than done - but little by little, I am chiseling away at the adult defensive exterior and giving Anne what she really wants. So rather than pushing away - I can turn my attention to the things I want, which may or may not be a yes or a no to someone else - it's just my own Truth.
No one can argue against the truth and if it's yours, then poof - make it so.
Yes. No. Maybe. Another time. Not right now. We will see. I will know. Let me think about it.
All these statements are now possible if I ask myself what I really want.
The answer is always inside me. I am learning to listen for it.
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