~:W E E K * 2 3 * T U M M Y:~

We are up in Clayton this weekend for Doug's first father's day. I gave him a haircut and we're just about to open up pwesents. Oh, happy day. I love him. Have been waited on hand and foot up here - and proof of that is seen in my ankles which used to be cankles (that's terminology from Tania). My legs itch less up here - maybe it has something to do with swelling and stress - I dunno. But putting your feet up as much as you can seems to do the trick.

I am so happy. Da Bimp Page has been updated. Will post more lovely pictures of Doug, Dad, Mom and the doggies when they've been properly edited.

We've been searching for Bimp room furniture - only a few more months before he arrives. Found an incredible 7-piece set of Deco bedroom furniture with orange bakelite handles. Oh my god was that wonderful - and to make it even more hard to bear the thought that I could not have it was that someone got the whole set for $600.00!! Godhelpme. Ah well. There will be something else waiting for us somewhere. We don't want a ruffled, sterile and anemic nursery look for Bimp - rather - deep rich colors that excite and soothe - an extension of who we are as a household. This will be a play room for all of us, BjornMouse included. So it's fun thinking of how this new space will nourish all of us. I can't wait!~

Love to you all,

~Anne

An e-mail I got from DougieFresh this afternoon. I'd say he found his special purpose, wouldn't you?

A student sent me this terrific article today. Read on!

~Anne

~:B A D * P U P P Y:~

Bad puppy? Bad mother! This morning I slept until 8:30. Cloudy. A little cooler, yes. But I should have known today was going to start out wretched. I get BjornShit out of his crate and the very second we go downstairs and right before I put the leash on him, at the door, he pees right there on the rug. Little fucker. I BAHHHHED him loudly and we went outside. There was a teensy weensy bit of moisture in the air which means, my friends, that pooping will be difficult. Turd courting, A DougieFresh calls it, is not easy for a finicky toy dog. No poop this morning means back into the crate. We tried again after my shower. No luck then, either. I am at a loss. While away at PC critiquing last night, BjornShit had a blast in the living room, peeing and pooping like there was no tomorrow. I found that this morning. So I am not happy. We had a trainer, (who, quite frankly, I am not happy with) come for a few visits. She's from Bark Busters. $400.00 later we are still in the same mess we were in a year ago. I'm just not cut out for this stuff. I am a bad mother. Bjorn's behavior is a direct reaction to my own behavior. That's how it goes between parents and their kids. I am ready to give up.

I had nightmares all last night of aliens attacking the planet and keeping a very watchful eye over me. I kept trying to call Doug, but couldn't get him. They were keeping him away from me. They were watching me and Bimp and waiting for him to be born so they could take him away from me.

"But you can't have him" I said.

"Of course we can. How do you think we got your first one, Anne?"

They took my first. And there's nothing I can do about it. And they're letting my second make it to term before they take him away, too. This helplessness. This fear. I can't stand it.

"WAKE UP, Anne" I said to myself. Wake up I did.

I hate not having control. I hate the unknown. Fuck wonder.

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Looks like Mary McLuhan and I are very similar. :)
And thank GOD I'm not Saddam like poor Tonya.

~:W O N D E R * W O M A N:~

Tania Recently posted a childhood picture on her beelog, in response to a few of us other beeloggers who also think we looked either cute or ridiculous at a young age. I have a new one for you. (And I think we have started a trend, ladies).

Here's the story: The year my parents decided that celebrating Halloween was satantic and eeeevil, Peter and I passed out candy to all our neighborhood friends while in our PJ's. It was agony. We ended up fighting over who got to hold the bowl, so Mom sent us to bed early. Just about the worst night of my young life.

To compensate, she made Peter a Shazaam costme and me a Wonder Woman costume for the following night of "blessing treating" at the church. Oy. Well, it was better than nothing. Back to the costume: I still remember her sewing on the stars to my blue shorts. I got to wear a wig (yes I think we used spray net, too), fasle eyelashes (that glue nearly made me go blind in both eyes), Lee Press-On Nails (although you can't see them here) and yes, HIGH HEELED SHOES (wish you could see those, too). I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Completely worth the sacrifice of the previous night. My best Halloween ever.

Don't I look spendid? I think this slimming costume does Wonders for me.

~:D O U G I E * F R E S H * M O U S E:~

This is a man who is ready for fatherhood. Yup. And this is his mouse who is ready for a nap. We are all going upstairs right now for a Saturday slumber and I bid all of you peace in da house. To see more Dougie Fresh Mouse pictures, click here!

PS: Steven, these will make you want to wretch, I'm pretty sure of it.

Oh man, Sarah, now I don't know what to do. I am gravid with doubt. (he he)

I can't sleep. It's 4:30 in the morning. My legs are O N F I R E. This rash is killing me, God help me. I have broken skin and a growling stomache. And you think pregnancy is too easy? Kidding. I know what you meant. So is it to be "Tommy" or "Anne-Davnes"?

Of course, if Holger decides to teach the class while I'm teaching one myself, then all bets are off for now. But if I can take it now - I could do both. One now - the other later. Maybe that's the solution.

Like the picture?

~:D E S I G N:~

See these lillies? How mouth-watering they are? They are perfect. Growing in my front yard right now. I hope to create something as close to these as I can get. I am inspired! So I have signed up for Holger Kappenstien's Typeface Design class at PC and I'm so excited. I'll be able to take it providing it doesn't conflict with one of my own classes. Thank you Holger! He says that by week two, we are to commit to a name for the font we're creating and stick with it for the entire quarter. I've a few ideas/options to consider that I'd like your feedback on.

1. "GRAVID"
This means "Being with child; heavy with young or eggs; pregnant." Would be really cool to design a face, each character with a bump or elegant protrusion, each balanced with asymmetry, which is how my body feels. Flourishing in this rare life-giving state is fascinating. What better way to honor this special time than to design a face during this transformation? Only drawback is that I might find this gets old after a while. But sticking to it would be a labor of love, if it ended up being difficult. Which is the nature of creativity. So...hmmm. I'm really tempted to tackle this idea.

2. "TOMMY"
I have an older brother who took his life when he was 34. This happened about 8 years ago. One of those experiences that's changed me forever. And continues to teach me things. I thought honoring him by creating a face that celebrates his personality - the best of his personality would be a great tribute. Another labor of love. Tommy and I were so very different from each other. I'd say the only two real similarities were 1. that we shared the same sense of humor. Oh God, could he make me laugh. I miss that. 2. We had the same big toe. No kidding. To remember his presence, all I need to do it take off my socks and stare at my big toe. That's tommy.

The greatest thing Tommy accomplished was hiking the Appalachian Trail. Yep - he was a beautiful thru hiker. His trail name was "Darling Boy" - something our Mother called him.

I was thinking that the face should look nothing like me. It should be physically strong. He was an ox of a person. He was ruddy. Elegant. Incredibly brave. Sturdy. And he loved the outdoors. He would have survived a nuclear war - would have ended up a king if the tables turned so. He did not have book smarts - but an instinctive awareness of how things worked naturally. And he was spiritual. And his anger. Fierce. You'd want him on your side if in battle. Tommy fought off monsters. The only one that got him in the end was what he saw in the mirror. His self esteem damaged from too many poor decisions and a learning disability that left him feeling less than everyone else.

But man - I'd love to make this face out of wood. Wood cuts. Or twigs. Pinestraw. I dunno - some kind of natural material that I could vectorize. (is that a word??) Something sturdy to honor him. I'd want you to look at it and say, "Hero. Thru hiker. Anne's brother, Tommy." And want to know him.

Only drawback is that I want this to be something totally for myself. Is guilt part of my motivation? Or would that just be part of my journey? I dunno.

3. "Anne-Davnes" or "Davnes"
This would be another self portrait. I love calligraphy. Have developed my own style by now, based upon Copperplate. Addressing envelopes with a steel nib dipped in ink is yoga for the hands and soul. I absolutely love it. Can't get enough of it! My calligraphy is somewhat free-spirited and irregular. Gives a nod to the past, but is rather contemporary. There's a lot of grace there - irregular grace. I just love it. Makes me happy.

Were I to turn this into a font, that irregularity would need to be somewhat diminished or harnessed. This would be a face with rhythm, but with a level of consistency. I think it would be terribly exciting to decide which characters have descenders or ascenders that can reach high or dip deeply. I think I can do that, as long as there are but a few special ones without them all fighting for attention. To be a calligrapher who has designed a version of their natural hand for keystroking would be very, very rewarding. I think this would give me the most natural high out of all my options. The strokes themselves give me great pleasure. I know what you're thinking - you perverts. :)

I think this last option is the one I want to go with. but is it big-headed of me to name it after myself? I thought Davnes would be so elegant. It's Norwegian and should I have a girl someday, I'll give that name to her as well.

Saying no to the first 2 options is something I'm not quite ready to do. I want this exercise to be pleasant but to stretch me, too. What do you guys think? Any opinions?

~:B I M P * 2 1 * W E E K S:~

Updated the Bimp Page with this photo. We took a bunch of photos and picked this one, where Doug instructed me to say "sassssssy" as he snapped the camera. Still feeling that way, thank you. I am now 140 pounds. Thank you. Thankyouverymuch. Thank you.

Well I am a little happier this evening. Went to the school today for one on one meetings with students and Nick brought me a chocolate bar. We shared it. Thank you, Nick. Then Bimp awoke and I got to feel him nudge me all day long. That's one of the really fun parts.

I've read that your baby picks up on your moods. That sure happened to us today. All 3 of us, Bjorn, Bimp and I barely made it out of bed. But once the chocolate arrived and good work started flowing in for me to look at, why - who would want anything else? So it was a great day. Teaching just puts me in a better mood. Chocolate helps, too. And the fabulous comments from you fabulous women - you know who you are.

I came home and stopped by to visit Mom and Dad - helped Mom with her computer. Then drove home and as I watered plants, Doug pulled into the driveway. So we weeded together for a few minutes while BjornMouse picked a breezy, sunny patch on the lawn to watch us. Hostas are blooming, the hibiscus I thought I killed is coming back, the vinca I transplanted is doing well, pansies are coming up in shady areas, in spite of the heat. Dougie Fresh got a job with CheckFree, who has fallen in love with his mad skills. We have better insurance now and I get to go back to my old OBGYN to announce my 21st week of pregnancy, after a painful miscarriage nearly 2 years ago. Life is good to us.

You guys are right. Who cares about the rash. I love my career, family and friends and the work that comes with all of it.
And I am going to be a mother.

Good news:

I now have a cute bathing suit, which should make you proud, A.

Bad news:

Said bathing suit does not have polka dots. That one came in the wrong size. Phooey.

Good news:

I've got the red lipstick, vintage cut shades and a cute hat to accompany the belly.

Bad news:

As of 3 days ago, I could no longer bend over to polish my toenails, which I have done religiously for the last 20 years or so of my life.

Good news:

I was given persmission by the financial dept of our household to splurge for a pedicure. Poor me. Poor, poor me. Oh my god was it heaven.

Bad news:

Weight gain in the hips and thighs area comes with pregnancy... so the tops of my legs rub together now which I HATE. Sarah - should I be using powder? Oh my god is it uncomfortable in hot weather.

Good news:

I H A D to have a new pair of pants that are ever so comfortable and provide a nice buffer for sweaty skin against sweaty skin. (too much info? sorry)

Bad news: I have developed a weird pregnancy rash on my legs below the knees. And there is no good news associated with this one.

And that's just about all I can think of to say. I have been swifted away into the pregnancy bubble and feel very ar away from the rest of you. I celebrate my pregnancy most of the time, but today just don't feel quite right. I feel heavy and burdened. Bimp's not moving much. And oy - nausea has returned. At least for today.

Sunshine? Where ARE you this morning ? ? Come back to me.

~:F E E L I N G * B I M P:~

We are at 20 - 21 weeks now and I've been feeling Bimp move and squirm every time I'm siting or lying still. It is AMAZING. Feels like a little squish. A tickle. A squirm. Like a soft thump, thud, muscle twinge. And this morning while lying in bed, Doug pressed his hand down low on my belly and felt Bimp move several times. Oh my goodness what fun we are having.

He's supposed to be able to hear by now. So we're talking to him. In a couple of weeks, we go to the beach and he should see sunlight through my belly. Time to start singing and taping stereo speakers to my belly. Dance, Bimp Dance!

Mom took me shopping yesterday. I finally have real maternity wear. Soooo much more comfortable. Thank you GOD!!

Time to start filling Bimp's room with gear.

Cheers!!

~Anne

~:D E A R * S A R A H:~

What started out as a really nice day quickly turned ugly. Doug and I decided to clean out the guest bedroom to get it ready for Bimp. This bedroom has, within the 3 short years we've lived in this house, turned into a horrifically disorganized storage space. "Where do we put THIS ugly thing, or broken thing, honey? Wait! Don't throw that OUT. I'll fix it later. We NEED it." Those are the kinds of conversations we had each time the door to this room got opened or shut.

Lordy. I should have known better than to try tackling this task today. But it has to be done, or Bimpie sleeps with Bjorn, which would get us into a lot of trouble. After just one hour, I'm regretting every little knick knack I saved, every photo, sketchbook, book, broken something, poster, postcard, xmas card, schnittle... you name it. We've kept it. So I'm feeling out of control by 2:00 in the afternoon. My life's dirty, messy, cluttered. I am unprepared for parenthood. I would have liked to have cleaned the house today, but now I've got an unpacked room of trinkets and bad memories AND a dirty house.

Little Bjorn's downstairs being ignored. Even HE'S dirty. So he gets a bath. And I'm mad at him for squirming. So I'm yelling. Doug's upstairs fumbling in the attic. I've just returned from Kroger to get hamburger makings and managed to snag the very last bag of buns (these are the soft white boring kind) and have unpacked my bags only to realize I've forgotten the fucking beef. Kill me now. Did I mention I'm pregnant, too? Hot, fat, bloated and hormonal? And that I cried during the last half of Yoga class Saturday morning?

Doug (who has been SUCH a great husband these past few months) goes back to Kroger to get the meat. I decide that I can't stand one more second of animal hair on the floor, so I get the vacuum out. After Bjorn pees on the floor, Doug puts him in his crate to nap. Yes. We are going to be really great parents. Hmmm. So the floor's clean but I'm fuming by now, practically in tears by the time Doug gets back.

So what do I do now? What therapy can ease my grief, my anger, my feeling of loss of control and resignation? My fear? Ah ha!! I will take Sarah's Rock Bottom sticker photos! Of all four of us!! It took all of 5 minutes to take them and I had a really good laugh afterwards. As did Doug. So thanks for the catharsis. We needed it.

XO,

~Anne

~:C A L L I G R A P H Y:~

Good morning everyone! I had a fun weekend getting my calligraphic ducks in a row. In preparation for the big life changes coming in October, I decided that I wanted more calligraphy business while shifting into my new role as a mother. I will be taking one quarter off from teaching at PC on maternity leave, but would still like to create with my hands and make a little money while doing so. Desiging a logo and calligraphing an envelope are two very different things. Calligraphy is soothing - yoga for the spirit and hands, it's challenging enough and rhythmic - perfect for my personality. And as gratifying as design is, I can't quite picture myself being able to think very clearly in three hour sleep deprived sessions. So!

I made a series of little sample books (thank you to Michael Goodman's bookmaking class) to pass out at various businesses in Atlanta. I lowered my prices a little, which so far has had a favorable response. Visiting vendors was fun. The folks at Paper Affair were terrifically friendly and supportive. Even went to the bridal department at SAKS and they fell all over my work, displaying my samples right up front with happy smiles. Very, very nice.

Surprisingly, I got the cold shoulder from Swoozies. Apparently, they've got to check with corporate. At the least, they might put my name on a "list" with other calligraphers they'd recommend. But they refused to accept a sample for display. I suppose I understand. Maybe I should have dressed up more or hid my bimp?? Did I look like a shmo? I dunno.

Sam Flax was very complimentary, though. Such nice people. Young and fun and spirited. It was a great day. So now I'm pumped and want to make more. I think I'll atttack the bridal shops next and see if they'll help market me. Understand, I am NOT a business person. So small steps like these amaze me. Especially when they turn out to be uplifting.

If you'd like to see the new AED Calligraphy site I put up, go here. Annnnnd, if you'd like a sample book of your own - write to me with your address and I'll send you a couple!

Cheers! We clear out Bimp's room today. Wish me luck! Oh! Almost forgot to tell you we're at 20 weeks now. The half way point! A new tummy picture is posted on the Bimp Page.

XO,

~Anne

~:W E L C O M E * I A N:~

Jason and Lindsey have had their baby! Welcome little Ian!

~:P O S T * H A S T E:~

"The next PostSecret Book will be released October 1st. Any postcard received before June 1st might be in it," reads an entry in this Sunday's PostSecret edition.

Okay, Frank, you motherfucker. I've sent you COUNTLESS fucking postcards and have yet to see one posted on your silly sight. Postcards worthy of a designer's nod or attention. I mean come ON. Give me SOMEthing here. I teach this stuff fer fuckssake. What do I have to do? Write an ugly, self-centered post about you???? God HELP me if I don't see one of my cards in your new silly book, I just don't know what.

Honestly!

~:B J O R N O G R A P H Y:~

Time to share something non Bimp related. Last week, Bjorn and I were approached by Keith Oh to take part in his data blitz. I have posted it here for you to see.

The concept was to show three good and bad ideas. Massaging type was a good idea, but when applied to a 5.5 lb. papillon, rather MY 5.5 lb. papillon Bjorn, it turned into BAD touch. A little tough to stomach poor Keith being pummeled by his "friends". Fun to watch James fall out of his chair and to see Scott loosing a shoe. Nice cartwheel, dude.

Thanks for sharing Keith! Fantastic job.

~:S I R * B I M P:~

Hang on to yer hats everybody because le Bimp is a B O Y !!! I was compeltely wrong about the sex! The whole time I thought you were a girl. Mom came with us for the ultrasound and we hollered and giggled to find out it was a he. Now I'm thinking all those dreams I had of pink was about me, myself being "in the pink". Makes sense when you think about it.

Oh the fun I'm going to have with costumes and superheroes and uniforms and OH! Bimp? WHO are you?? Can't wait to find out. I am thrilled to have a tinkering little boy. All my bloodwork turned out fine - Bimp measured well. Only thing fishy is a placenta previa thingie - where it's not positioned where it should be. This should correct itself on its own. But if it doesn't we'll have a C section. I don't care much - as long as he's out OK and healhy.

We are so blessed, so excited, so grateful. Happy to share the news with you. He'll be Bimp for now and as we figure out names, which I'm sure will take us up until the day he's born, we'll continue to refer to the little pea as Bimp. Oh happy day! I am in heaven! You should have seen him move around. Very cool - so amazing, so humbling. The image of him in the upper left is of his face looking right at us - his right arm is bent and stretched back behind his head and you can see his fingers peeking behind it for a wave. Hi Bimp! Hello sweet little muffin cake, bouncing bubble Bimp boy. My sweet little boy - I love you!

~:M O T H E R'S * D A Y:~

My first and it went wonderfully. Mom gave me the necklace you see here inscribed with "bimp". I'm never taking it off. To see more of the Mother's Day photos we took, go here .

~:B O O B S H E L F:~

So I had something wonderful happen this morning. I am sitting in my red chair in the kitchen and BjornMouse jumps up to sit in my lap - only he couldn't because Gunther was already there soaking in the sun. So he bypasses my lap and finds a better seat: my shoulders. Then he realizes how comfortable this seat is because he can rest his sweet little bunny paws upon my blue-veined chest, which is now large enough to be deemed Papillon furniture - like it's a paw rest. He he.

***SMILE***

Never in my life have I had this many curves. Never in my life have I been so proud of roundness. Never in my life have I been able to sleep in till 10:00 without feeling guilty, or finish my plate or choose a tall glass of water over a soft drink.

So for those of you who make fun of me for showing "them" or my tummy off - pooh on you. I've earned it!

So is there a connection between the two of these L O S T cast members, Cynthia Watros and Michelle Rodriguez, being arrested back in December in Hawaii for DUI within 15 minutes of each other AND the fact that both of their characters were shot in the same episode? Was this the night they found out they'd be leaving the set or did they get written out b/c of their naughtiness? Hmmmm.

~:T H E * E N T I T Y:~ Doug found this curious image doing a Google image search for "Elser". At first glance it reads as one word, but the Spanish translation of El Ser reads, "The Thing" or "The Entity". This would be a great direct mail piece or xmas or business card or SOMEthing!

~: B I M P * P A G E:~

At last you have here a revealing photo of Bimp from the outside. Super-showing compared to just a few weeks ago. We took this photo on this rainy afternoon, after sleeping in until 10:00. I know. Pretty lame. Couldn't be helped and BjornMouse even joined us to listen to the soft rain showers hitting the roof above our heads. It was lovely. So! I have made a page of everything bimp for those of you who are interested. Photos beginning with the 1st HPT (sorry, no conception images will be available), to telling good news to family, watching bimp grow in the belly, how obnxious my belly gets from the outside, any celebrations applicable and development of the nursery (a nursery!!). Should be fun to update and a great way to keep out of town friends and family in the loop. I love you all!

~Anne

~:F R E S H * R I P - O F F:~

Time for a fiery blog entry.

So I think I made THE most irresponsible financial decision I've ever made last Wednesday. It's lunchtime. I'm hungry. Starving. Don't want fast food or anything greasy, so I decide to go back (against better judgement) to try the new Fresh Market in Buckhead for a healthy and hearty lunch. Boy, was I in for a surprise.

But before I go on, let me tell you why my first experience was not so great. I went in for lunch shortly after their opening day in February to get a sandwich. Since this store is located on busy Peachtree Street at a not-so-friendly intersection, you'd assume that they cater to mostly busy executives, hospital staff and visitors, and students (since Portfolio Center is right across the street, the hospital a little further down and SCAD is just down the street). Folks just want to dive in and out as quickly as possible with something other than a potential coronary on a plate, right? And it was for this reason that when the Fresh Market in Buckhead first opened, I was very excited. I've been missing Harry's in a Hurry for far too long and don't always care to travel the maze in Publix to make it in and out of their deli line for one of their custom made subs. Back to my story - I'm at the deli and pick out a ready made chicken wrap and ask the attendant where their forks and knives are. She points to a basket. I pick out a fork. No knives? She shrugs her shoulders and tells me I'll find those at the register. Hmmph. So I'm at the register and after paying an arm and a leg for that little chicken wrap, I ask for a knife. I was told flatly that they don't have any knives. "Are you sure?" Yes, well the deli might have them. "Well, then will you go check for me, please?" She leaves and returns with another flat, "NO." Not a sorry - we must be out of them. Or maybe a "I'll go check in the back." I was this close to returning everything I'd just purchased and gone back to Publix.

Can't you tell when an employee is happy to give you the answer they know will displease you? Well this was one of those cases. ARRRRG.

So back to my most recent unpleasant Fresh Market experience. I think I made THE most irresponsible financial decision I've ever made, right? It's lunchtime. I'm hungry. Starving. First thing I've got a craving for is watermelon. I pick up a little container of it in the produce section. Yummm, it looks delicious. Until I look at the price tag. $4.33. NO shit. I'm thinking to myself, "boy, this is stupid, Anne." But I decide to splurge.

Next, I'm at the deli counter again and this time decide to try one of their custom made sandwiches. I order a chicken salad sandwich. Without a word, this woman who tried so hard to make me wait for acknowledgment of my presence, pointed to a "form" I had to fill out first before she would make my sandwich. "For accuracy", she said, with a rotation of her head, via her neck, at her shoulders with an a-la-urban-esque-you-aint-no-bettah-den-me-juss-cuz-I-be-wearin-dis-green-apron-beeotch gesture. Jesus Christ, how complicated can a chicken salad sandwhich be? Costs me around $5.00. Almost as much as that fucking watermelon. When I get back to the school to eat it, I open the sandwich to discover ONE slice of tomato, ONE leaf of lettuce, and a .25 inch pathetically thin layer of "chicken salad", consisting of mostly mayo and some kind of pickle/relish mixture. I find ONE good chunk of chicken in there. But lemme tell you, this sandwich was not short of bread. Hmmm. I was so mad. The other stupid thing I did was to purchase a tray of about 8 cookies for my class to share with me. They were thick, heavy, bland cookies. I like my cookies to have some crunch to them. These had none. Might have well been pudding. SO! I'm N O T going back. If their service was better, staff friendlier, that might entice me.

What's puzzling, though, is that I go to The Fresh Market in Dunwoody all the time and I LOVE them! They've got an outstanding bakery, and really go out of their way to help you find your way around, answer any questions you might have and give you a generally pleasant shopping experience.

At the Bucked location, they make you work hard to ask a question, to make yourself visible in the first place and then to get an answer delivered politely is tough, too. On opening day at Buckhead, I told the deli guy at the counter, "I'm so glad you're here! I work across the street at PC and am looking forward to coming here often for lunch." The response I get from him is a monologue of what he really wants to do with his life and how he's looking for a career change and he wants to get out of the food service industry and how can he apply for classes at Portfolio Center. Whoa. "Um, I think I'll go to Publix instead, thanks."

~:T H E * T H I N G:~ For all you bloggers who are falling asleep on AnnePages due to lack of posts... here's an update. NO, it's not my belly. That'll come this weekend. But check this creepy image out. Can you see my blue veins? By the time I'm ready to go into labor, there will be 50% MORE blood pumping through my body. Now - there's already much more - and you can see it in my chest. My pulse is stronger and more rapid also. I can make the headboard knock against the wall in our bedroom just with my obnoxious pulse. Weird, huh?

One advantage to the increase in blood flow is that I've said goodbye to cold feet and having to wear socks at night. I'm comfortably warm. I hope the summer's not too hot for me. One disadvantage to the whole blood thing is that its first duty is to the womb. Which means there's less flowing through my brain - which means that when I open my mouth to verbalize the few thoughts left IN my brain, I sound like a fucking third grader. No shit! I am losing my vocabulary. And my mind.

Ok. So you're still bored? Sorry. I'll post the belly pictures next.

XOXOX,

~Anne

Hey everyone, don't forget to check out Bjorn's new blog entry on BjornPages: B J O R N P A G E S: Yes, I'm a Rockstar.

~:L O V E * L E T S * G O:~

I came across this beautiful quote yesterday in our Emotive Alphabet calligraphy class at PC yesterday. Christy brought in a bunch of great quotes all about traveling and being free, letting go, etc. I wrote this one down for myself. It reminds me to let go of those who need more than what I have to offer. Especially those who have died - who have moved on, whether that choice was theirs or not.

Tommy was one of those folks who needed to go. Was unhappy for too much of his life. In respecting his choice, in the end, I chose honor him by letting him go. It is very freeing. Sure, I still get mad and angry and relive the process of letting go all over again. But coming back to this point of surrender is beautiful, welcoming and real.

When someone makes a choice that puzzles me, whose left a trail of destruction for all to remember and I'm thinking, "What an asshole - what's their fucking problem!????" - I will try think of this quote and to remember that it's not up to me to save ANYONE, except for myself.

Thanks for the epiphany. {{sigh}}

~: O H * M Y:~ And I thought I was creative! Thank you to Wogah for this fun link. Check out the terrificly brilliant wit in Patricia Waller’s Alluring Crochet Works. Can't decide if my favorite is the bunny stabbed with carrot or the pink fetish ware. Hmmmm. What are yours?

~:D O G * C H A T:~ Ruthie and Bjorn took over our fancy iSight cameras and had a little chat yesterday. One would bark, the other would look around the room, behind one of us, then back at the camera. Very confusing. Mom and I are laughing all the while. This is what I do, instead of doing something productive.

~E A S T E R * N A P:~

Holidays are hard work, as you can see here. It's hard for both of these creatures to stay so cute. Who can say no to a man in pink? Lying down in a bay window with a papillon? I can't. We took many pictures during our time up in Clayton, during which I first told you and my grandmother Nonie that we were pregnant. I spent that Sunday reading through your gazillion lovely comments and answering e-mails from friends and family. Lots of fun. I can't thank you enough for your support and love. Really means a lot.

We also graduated Bjorn to almost free status of life without a leash (for the most part). Dad's dog Alice Faye was wonderfully calm and very gentle with BjornMouse, as were other dogs who visited us that day. If you'd like to see more Easter in Clayton photos, there are more here.

~:C H A T T 'N * W H O R E:~

My dorky (and generous) little brother Peter got me an iSight thingie for my birthday! Woo hoo! Mom got one, too. And we've been chattn away. Now that there's an Elser baby on the way - it makes sense for our family to have cameras, so we can enjoy each other virtually and for virtually nuth'n.

Today, Audrey graciously allowed me to interrupt her important school work and accepted my iChat invitation. So for those of you who have one - look me up!

The latest and greatest photo of my niece Mia. There are more Easter photos here, if you wanna see 'em!

~: I N T R O D U C I N G * B I M P :~

I have some very happy Easter news for all of you. This little sweater I just finished belongs to the new Elser baby who will arrive to meet you all in mid-October! We are calling him/her "Bimp" for now and are sooooo excited. I have been dying to tell you and at last have said goodbye to the 1st trimester (and I hope nausea as well!). We are at 13 weeks - heard the heartbeat yesterday and saw Bimp wiggle and dance at week 9. UH-MAY-ZING. Quite a little miracle this pregnancy is. We are counting our blessings and I am feeling kinda like Wonder Woman. It's an amazing experience.

So now you guys know I have not just let myself go and gotten FAT! For the first time in my life, I have boobs - thank God in heaven I have boobs! Sorry - don't have a picture for that one. And Bjorn will have a little sister or brother! And God has been good to us! And Spring is here! Remember those little seeds I tried to plant in the little indoor greenhouse kit? They DIED. Who cares - I've got something better growing in my belly.

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers for the next few months. Happy. Excited. Nervous. Grateful. And my husband Doug? He's been a dream. I can't wait to see him as a father. Oh happy, happy day. Happy Easter everyone!

~Anne

One of Mom's new landscapes. Sorry about the glare. But isn't it beautiful? Luscious.

~:L A T E * T H I R T I E S * F E E L * F A B:~

We took many more birthday pictures of dinner last night, if you care to see them. My actual birthday isn't until Monday, during which I will be ushering in a new group of first quarter PC students - so we decided to celebrate last night. Mom, Dad and Doug pitched in together and bought me this lovely Elsa Perretti necklace from Tiffany's. She's the same designer of my wedding ring. This necklace is en route to atlanta - so I should receive it Monday. Thank you so much Mom, Dad and Doug! I can't wait to wear it.

~:I S * I T * M E ?: ~ Ahh, the hosts of Atlanta's Classic Radio. Is it me? Or does the radio voice of FM 90.1 WABE'S Wanda Yang Temko sound like she's ripping the upholstery off the seat of her chair with her asshole? Listening to her makes me extremely nervous and uptight. I have to admit that she was much more uptight when she first came to the station in 2002. Sadly, now the affected voice of Lois Reitzes (who sounds like she's speaking with cotton balls in her cheeks and is guided by a broken metronome) isn't the only voice that makes me cringe. God help me.

I'd have to say that after all this needling complaining, my favorite radio personality on WABE is H. Johnson - Saturday night's host of Jazz Classics. What a character and what energy and what fun to listen to him on a Saturday night with friends. Even though you are guaranteed to be interrupted by his energetic comments for the first 2 minutes of each piece, you're sure to be entertained by a truly genuine and upbeat voice. The classics don't have to be boring, people.

7 THINGS TO DO BEFORE I DIE:

1. Have a baby
2. Finish my wedding album
3. Spend a week in Provence
4. Talk to Tommy again
5. Have multiple orgasms
6. Convert the back porch into a ceramics and painting studio
7. Get a female Papillon for Bjorn and name her Inga

7 THINGS I CANNOT DO

1. Wait to have a baby
2. Imagine life before marriage
3. Run
4. Put the left sock on before the right without falling
5. Have multiple orgasms
6. Sight read sheet music
7. Feel at peace without the house being clean

7 THINGS I SAY MOST OFTEN

1. Bjorn! Come!
2. Bjorn! Go to bed!
3. Jesus Fucking Christ!!
4. Honey - can you do me a favor?
5. What's for dessert?
6. People are so fucking stupid
7. No, thanks.

7 BOOKS I LOVE

1. Chicken, Shadow, Moon and More - Mark Strand
2. Socks Socks Socks - (Knitting patterns)
3. Cloud Nine (A Dreamer's Dictionary)
4. The Prince of Tides - Pat Conroy
5. Pillars of the Earth - Ken Follett
6. Please Understand Me - Meyers Briggs
7. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee

7 MOVIES I CAN WATCH OVER AND OVER

1. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
2. Raising Arizona
3. The Pink Panther
4. Young Frankenstein
5. The Sound of Music
6. West Side Story
7. The Jerk

~:S U N S H I N E * I N:~

Doug and I have one common "sport" we love to do together (other than going to see movies or watching the Sopranos). We love taking care of the house - working on the yard, gardening, painting, laying brick, etc. And we love taking a whole day to do it together. We find a little shady spot for Bjorn and set him down in between us while we work. Owning a house and taking care of it is one of life's great pleasures. It's the only thing you can spend money on without feeling guilty. Curb appeal just makes life rosier. For everyone.

SO! One of the things Doug started doing last year wass removing the screens from our windows. The difference is night and day, I tell you. Screens make your windows look sad and neglected. Gray, muddy, like a smoker's car windows, TV screen or computer keyboard. Tinted with tar. Totally gross. Being a smoker for 15 years (I quit 3.5 years ago) I should know. Back to the window screens - we got half way around the house last year - and then got distracted. All the screens from the front of the house had gone to the Dekalb County dump while the back of the house remained smothered in screens for another season.

Just last weekend, Doug took the remaining screens off the back of the house. This means the kitchen and music room. Oh my goodness what a difference. We spend most of our time together in the cozy bay window nook in our kitchen. The photo you see here shows the difference. Crisp, clear true-to-life color beaming in with no inhibitions. Green that's proud of itself. I swear - there is no place - I mean NO place I'd rather be than in my kitchen bay window.

So I took lots more pictures, if you'd like to see them. I know many are of Bjorn, but man - can't you just feel that sun? Sheer heaven.

I found the following mean spirited comment on Mary's blog and just HAD to add my two cents:

Audrey said...
did you know at 5am mary resembles the stray cat that hangs out across from PC? meow! just wanted to add some love to your neverending comment list....

Mary said...
HEY NOW, Audrey...that was studio week...Hank's class and NO sleep all rolled up into one. If you post that picture I will kill you...

So our dear friend Tania generously sent me the above pic she took of Mary during studio week---or what she likes to call Week of the Living Dead.

Mary must be some kind of Exotic Longhair???